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m/m Muscle University

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Thirty Two

I open my eyes and this feeling of warmth washes over me. The last time I woke up this happy was the morning after me and Luke were together for the first time.

And now here is, my boyfriend (my fucking boyfriend!) Luke, lying next to me in his bed with his head resting on his pillow. And it hits me, that I’ll be waking up to this every morning next term, for the rest of my first year at Montgomery University of Bodybuilding & Fitness. And for the whole of my second year too, in what ever dorm room is assigned to us. I’m going to head to see Johnny straight after my Anatomy & Aesthetics lecture with Hancox to tell him that I definitely don’t want the single room he’s managed to secure me. 

I turn to my side, wrap my arm around Luke’s waist and push my body against his. The corner of his mouth curls into a dreamy grin as I do so. 

It’s crazy to think about all that time I spent hanging out with Luke where I was dying to kiss him. All those times we were sitting on each other’s beds, hanging out, watching Harry Potter or Johnny Bravo or Dom and bloody Cole, and all I could think about was how badly I wanted to reach out and fucking touch him. All that time I spent fantasising about being able to do just that. 

And now I get to do all those things. I get to kiss him. I get to touch him any time I want. I get to squash my pecs against his much smaller chest. I get to reach my hand round and cheekily squeeze that insanely cute arse I spent so much time thinking about and picturing spilling out of his shiny blue posing trunks. I get to brush my legs against his meaty little thighs. And (fuck!) feel his huge, hard cock digging into me the way it’s doing right now.

“Jesus. Are you ever NOT hard?” I ask Luke, squeezing my body hard against his.

“What do you expect?” he says, gripping on to my big upper arm. “My boyfriend’s a fucking bodybuilder!”

And suddenly my heart feels like it’s about to fucking burst. Because FUCK - Luke just called me his boyfriend. And now there’s this weird tension. And Luke’s clearly realised what he just said. Because he suddenly looks a little panicked. 

“Oh shit!” he says.

I pull a face. “Boyfriend? I don’t remember saying I was your boyfriend.”

And Luke’s face fucking falls. “I just meant -”

“Luke! I’m fucking with you!”

He narrows his eyes at me like he’s mad. But he’s got this big fucking smirk on his face too. “You dick!”

I laugh and squeeze him harder. And now he’s just beaming at me. This loving, dimple showing grin. My boyfriend (my fucking boyfriend!) Luke.

“So … what are we gonna do next week?” I ask him, feeling a sudden excitement at the thought of spending the first part of the Easter holidays with Luke. Just me and him in our dorm room. No Deano. No Shaun. No Posing Practice 101. Just me and my gorgeous little Hufflepuff.

“Well … we do have four more Harry Potter films to watch!” 

I laugh and roll my eyes. “We could go to Glasgow again? Maybe make, like, a day of it?”

“That could be cool!” Luke says, with an excited smile.

“Or … fuck it. Let’s go to Bristol!”

“What - so you can abandon me again?” he teases.

I smirk and squeeze him. “Oooh! I can see my mate!”

“Who?”

“Leonard!” 

Prick faced fucking Leonard. Who said that Luke was too nice for me. Who said it would all end badly if me and Luke got together. Who said I’d end up screwing him over. Why did I listen to that prick? Why did I let him get to me so much?

“Anyway, before all that ...” Luke says, a big mischievous smirk now on his face.

“What?!” I ask, confused and excited.

“I get to see you compete in a bodybuilding show!” he says, biting his bottom lip and giving my arm a squeeze. 

“You do know it’s not a proper bodybuilding show!”

Luke pulls a face. “It’s as good as! You do get tanned up, right?”

I nod. “They have tanning tents backstage apparently!”

“So I get to see you on stage. Tanned up. Wearing shiny posers!”

I can’t stop grinning. I love how excited Luke seems about the whole thing. 

“Bouncing your pecs in front of the whole uni to ‘I’m Sexy And I Know It’!” he says, playfully rolling his eyes. I laugh in response.

Luke gasps. “What colour posers are you gonna wear?”

“Hmmm. Haven’t decided yet. Wanna pick for me?”

Luke’s eyes widen in excitement.

“But NOT -”

“The pink ones!” he interrupts. I laugh and give him a squeeze. 

“So … I was thinking …” Luke begins mysteriously. “After the show …”

I smirk and feel a flutter of excitement. “Yeah?”

“Maybe we could back here and you could, like, pose for me?”

Oh my fucking God YES.

“Hmmm. I mean … I’ll probably be pretty tired from the show!” I tease.

Luke smirks, rolls his eyes and shakes his head. I bring my face to his and kiss him as he’s still gripping on to my arm.

“Mmmm!” I say, as we part lips, my face still close to mine.

“So … you wanna see me pose?”

“Yeah!” he whispers, his mouth curling.

I reach my hand down and wrap my fingers around Luke’s gloriously huge (fuck!) and fully erect cock. He bites his bottom lip and beams in response.

“See me flex?”

“Yeah!”

I squeeze and tug his cock. “Tanned up. Flexing in posers?”

Luke lets out a cute little groan as I continue to play with his cock. “Fuck yeah!”

“Grunting and groaning like an animal with every fucking pose?”

He lets out a little laugh, his eyes closed and a look of pleasure on his face as I continue to tug away.

And then I suddenly release my hand and pull my face away. “Hmmm. Like I say, I’ll probably be pretty tired from the show!”

Luke stares at me, disappointment etched on his adorable face and his mouth hung open a little in surprise. Then he narrows his eyes at me. 

“You’re such a fucking DICK!” he says, smirking as he throws the duvet back and gets up to leave. But I don’t let him. I grab his arm, pull him back down and jump on top off him, both of us laughing as I pin him to the bed and sink my heavy mass into his smaller but perfect, Luke-sized body.

“So … you know that single room Johnny got me for next year?” I say to Luke a little later as I pull my blue Montgomery hoodie over me. He’s getting ready to go the gym while I’m about to head to Anatomy & Aesthetics. 

“Yeah?” he asks as he slings his gym backpack over his shoulder.

My stomach clenches. “Do you think …” I hesitate. “I mean, I was kinda thinking of asking Johnny if he’d consider giving it to Deano?”

Luke screw his face up. “Really?!”

I pull a face and shrug.

“How come?” he asks, clearly surprised.

My chest tightens. “Just … dunno. Thought it might be a nice thing to do?”

And now Luke’s mouth is curling into this affectionate, little grin, like he thinks my gesture is really sweet, and I feel like I want to fucking melt into the floor.

“Shaun will be fucking heartbroken!” he jokes.

I laugh. “He’s clearly secretly in love with Deano!”

I walk up to a now beaming Luke, squeeze his hand with mine and kiss him. I only let him go just before I open the door to our dorm room. And as we head in opposite directions, I turn around once to find Luke looking round at me at the same time. I laugh and he giddily grins back at me. Dimples and bloody everything. 

A few moments later and I’m walking through Hanson Hall and heading to my lecture when I notice two fellow first years, whose names I can’t remember right now, walking towards me. 

One of them is looking right at me. He leans into his mate and says something and the both of them smirk.

I glare at them confused as they walk past me. They whisper something else to each other and start sniggering like a pair of fucking twats. What the fuck? I stop and just glare at them and they carry on walking. I want to say something but I don’t. 

And now I’m fucking kicking myself for not doing so as I carry on walking to my lecture. Because I really wanna know what they were laughing about. Maybe they were making a joke about the fact that I wore my pink trunks to Posing Practice 101 last week? Both of those lads are in that lesson. Jesus. It really is like being back at school here sometimes. I can’t fucking wait for it to just be me and Luke next week for the Easter holidays.

And then another weird thing happens when I walk into the classroom for my Anatomy & Aesthetics lecture. Another lad nudges his friend and they both look at me wide eyed and smirking. Seriously - what the fuck is going on?

“Where’s Henderson, Woody?”

It’s Deano’s minion Shaun, calling out from a few rows behind me. I look around and he’s got this smug fucking look on his face. And now my stomach’s churning.

“Come on lads, quieten down!” Hancox instructs. I look at my lecturer and he makes eye contact with me, but there’s nothing in his expression that warrants any kind of concern or knowledge of what’s going on. 

And then I hear something which makes my stomach violently lurch. Shaun making kissing noises and the dickhead he’s sitting next to sniggering. What. The. FUCK?

Hancox starts talking. But my heart’s beating faster. And I’m starting to feel panicked. Why the hell was Shaun asking about Luke and then making kissing noises? 

And then my phone vibrates in my pocket and I have this horrible, horrible feeling that I’m not going to like what I’m about to read. That I really don’t wanna see what text I’ve just been sent. 

My chest tightens as I sneakily take my phone out of my pocket. I see Luke’s name and two words which makes me feel like I’m about to fall through the fucking floor.

“EVERYONE KNOWS!”

I sneakily type a reply to Luke’s text under my desk, making sure Hancox doesn’t catch me. My heart fucking pounding. 

“How??”

I turn my head around and spot some random guy looking at me with this really weird, uncomfortable look on his face. My phone vibrates again with a reply from Luke.

“Check the uni Facebook page. Woody! I’m freaking out!”

Fuck. What the FUCK?! This is not happening. This can NOT be happening. What the hell is on that Facebook page? I can’t just sit here wondering. 

I stand up and Hancox pauses and looks at me confused. 

“Sorry - can I just …” I say, signalling to the door. Hancox just nods at me, looking stern and unimpressed. 

As soon as I’m out of the classroom and in the corridor, I take my phone out again and load up the Montgomery University Facebook page I rarely ever check.

And right there, at the top of the page, I see something which sends my whole body into a panic. It’s the illustration of me kissing Luke on the cheek that I drew at the weekend. It’s not that clear that the guy doing the kissing is me. But there’s no question of who the other boy in the picture is. Black framed glasses. A little smile. Adorable dimples. It's unmistakably Luke. Being kissed on the cheek by another guy. Posted on the Internet for the whole university to see.

There’s a caption too. “Just roommates?? Looks like some of our fellow Montgomery students have been keeping secrets.” And then I look at the name of the person who uploaded it. Deano “The Pocket Rocket” Watkins. And I feel a rage like no fucking other.

I can’t go back to class. I need to see Luke. Oh God Luke! I send him a text.

“I’ve seen the post. Fucking Deano! Are you okay?? Where are you?”

And now I’m making my way back in the direction of our dorm room and the Watson House gym and my head is fucking spinning. How the fuck could Deano do this? I mean, yes he’s always been an annoying twat, but I never would have expected him to do something like this. Is it because I knocked him back? Bruised his ego? Did he do this out of jealousy over me and Luke?

And where the fuck did he get that picture? And then it hits me. Deano was in my room yesterday and my sketchbook was on top of my chest of drawers. And I’m pretty sure the pencil I used to draw it was still stuck in the page that illustration was drawn on.

Deano must have looked at the book when I was in the bathroom. And what? Stole the illustration? Or maybe just took a picture of it with his phone? So that’s why he was so desperate to leave. That’s why he was so pissed off. He saw the illustration of me kissing Luke and realised that the boyfriend called Max who lives back home doesn’t really exist. That the boyfriend I told him about was Luke all along.

My phone vibrates. Luke’s replied to my text. “Heading back to the room now!”

And just as I’m putting my phone back into my pocket, I see him. Deano. Twat faced fucking Deano coming out of what is obviously his dorm room with a backpack slung over his shoulder. And a pulsing rage takes over.

“You fucking TWAT!” I shout, lunging towards him. He spins around and quickly reacts by pushing against me. We scuffle and then he slams me up against the wall of the corridor, the weight of his heavy mass pressed against me. His chipmunk cheeks close to my face.

“What the fuck have you done?!” I say, pushing him off me. He relaxes and stumbles back, this smug smirk on his face. ARGH!! I want to hit him. I should fucking hit him. I should wipe that smirk right off his face. Even though I’ve never hit anyone in my life.

“What’s the matter, Woody? Your boyfriend lives back home. It can’t be Henderson!” 

“Are you fucking jealous? Is that why you did it?”

He screws his face up, like it’s a ridiculous suggestion. Like he’s disgusted at the thought.

“What if I tell everyone what happened in my room the other day? What if I announced the fact that you kissed me on Facebook?”

He narrows his eyes at me. But I can see a slight worry in his expression. “As if anyone would believe THAT!” he spits. 

And now I’m just looking at him. I can’t believe I kissed this guy. I can’t fucking believe I ever felt sorry for him. That I was actually going to ask Johnny if he’d consider giving him the single room he’d managed to secure me for my second year at Montgomery. 

I shake my head. “As if I would ever choose you over Luke!” 

And then Deano’s face drops. He’s no longer smirking. And I can tell by his expression that what I just said hurt him.

“Right! You two - away from each other NOW!” 

Deano backs away from me as Johnny marches towards us.

“Dean. Come with me!” he says, looking and sounding pissed off. Deano picks up his backpack up from the floor. He no longer looks smug. But he doesn’t look that worried either. He just looks kind of defeated. Almost like he’s suddenly given up.

Johnny puts a hand on my shoulder and squeezes it. Wow. He’s never done that before. “Are you okay, mate?”

For some reason I feel a sting in the back of my eyes. I think I’m seeing for the first time just how much Johnny Hoxton really does care about me. I just nod at him.

“I’ll speak to you later, okay?” 

And then he turns and I stand there watching Deano follow him. He looks back at me. And I notice something in his expression. Almost like a longing. And I suddenly don’t feel quite so angry anymore. Because I know, that although he did a really shitty thing, which he’s now clearly going to be punished for, deep down, the reason Deano did what he did is because he has feelings for me. 

As I walk back to my dorm room, the realisation of what has happened hits me. That everybody here at Montgomery University knows about me and Luke. Okay, maybe everybody is an exaggeration. Most of the second and third year guys don’t even know I exist. But the lads in my year, and everybody who saw or heard about the Facebook post knows. People here at Montgomery know that I’m gay. Fuck. 

And now something weird is happening. My whole body suddenly feels lighter. And it’s literally like a massive fucking weight has been lifted off me. Wow. And now I feel this unexpected surge of excitement. Maybe it’s because I’m finally the centre of attention again. Or maybe it’s because people now know that I’m with Luke; the boy I’m completely and utterly crazy about. Fuck. This is huge. So, so huge. But now I feel something else. A sharp pang of worry. Because … Luke. Oh shit. How is Luke going to feel about all of this?

And that worry only intensifies when I get back to our room and see the look on Luke’s face as he stands up from his bed. 

“Are you okay?” I ask, walking up to him and putting a hand on his forearm and grabbing his waist with my other. 

“Woody - I’m freaking out!” he says, shaking his head. God - he looks so fucking scared. I’ve never seen him like this before.

“Luke, it’s gonna be alright!” I tell him as I start to wrap both arms around his waist.

“It’s NOT!” he cries, squirming and pushing away. “Everyone’s seen that picture of us! Everyone knows we’re together!”

I can’t believe how scared Luke looks right now. What the hell do I say to try and convince him that this whole thing isn’t as bad as it seems? What can I do to take that awful look off his adorable fucking face?

“Luke - I know it seems bad, but …” I sigh, “look - not everyone will have seen the picture. I mean, half the guys here don’t even know who we are! And it will probably get taken down when one of the teachers gets wind of it.” 

I take my phone out of my pocket and load up the page. “Look - it’s already gone!” I say, handing Luke my phone.

He looks at it and just shakes his head. “It doesn’t matter. It’s done. People KNOW we’re together, Woody!”

My stomach twists sharply. Don’t say it. Don’t fucking say it.

“Is that … really so bad?”

“YES!” Luke says, without hesitation. He looks at me and groans. “Oh Woody. This isn’t about you! I don’t want people here to know I’m gay. You know that!”

I do know that. But I can’t deny that's there’s a part of me that wishes that Luke didn’t care quite so much whether people here at Montgomery and in the wider bodybuilder world know that he's gay. That he was so proud of the fact that me and him are together that it completely overrode any fears of the consequences of people knowing about his sexuality. 

“Okay, so … we lie!” I suggest. “We deny it. We don’t know where that illustration came from. Deano probably fucking drew it himself!”

He shakes his head at me. He looks so defeated. “People know, Woody!” He sighs and sits down on his bed. Then he puts his head in his hands. Fuck! I hate seeing Luke like this.

I sit down next to him, put my arm around his back and rest my chin on my shoulder. “You know what we need to do?”

Luke doesn’t respond. Or look at me. He just looks to the floor chewing on his bottom lip, looking like he has the weight of the fucking world on his cute little shoulders.

“We need to go out there and act like we don’t give a shit!”

He closes his eyes and shakes his head.

“If anyone says anything, just … say something witty in return!” 

Luke looks at me, that pained fucking expression on his face. “I can’t do that, Woody! I’m not like you.” 

“Then I’ll do it for you!” I say, rubbing his back with my hand. “I’m not gonna let anyone fuck with you, Luke! And anyway, there’s only, like, three more days left of the term.”

“And then what?” he says in a voice. He still looks so worried.

I swallow hard. And then I suddenly have a thought which makes my gut feels like it’s being wrenched. What if there’s nothing I can say here that will convince Luke that things will get better? 

“Maybe …” Luke begins, staring out into the room. He pauses.

“Luke?”

He turns his head and looks at me, this mix of anguish and nerves on his face. 

“Maybe I should just go home?”

FUCK!

“What?!” I suddenly realise I’ve taken my hand off his back.

“Just for a bit.”

What the FUCK? I shake my head. I can’t believe Luke’s saying this. I can’t believe he’d even think about leaving. 

“You can’t!”

My insides are clenching. My head is fucking spinning. No - these are just words. Luke’s just panicking right now. Surely he wouldn’t really do it? Surely Luke wouldn’t leave me?

“Luke - you’re not being serious?”

He shakes his head and looks at me, his beautiful piercing blue eyes looking sad. “Everything’s changed, Woody!”

And now I’m suddenly panicking. Because what if Luke’s right? What if everything has changed between us? What if we can’t go back? What if people knowing about has completely fucked things up? And now I’m starting to feel angry again at what that fucking prick has done.

“FUCK!” I cry. “All of this because of … jealous fucking Deano!”

“What do you mean?”

Luke looks at me, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. And my stomach fucking lurches. Because I’ve suddenly realised what I’ve just said. Oh God. Oh FUCK.

“I just mean …”

“Why is Deano jealous?”

Fuuuuck!

“Woody?”

What have I said? What the FUCK have I just done? I could lie here. I could make something up. But there’s a difference between not telling someone something and telling someone a lie. And right now, I don’t want to lie to Luke. 

“Okay - promise me you won’t freak out!” I say, trying to sound calm, even though my heart’s pounding. 

Luke just stares at me. He looks so confused. I breathe a deep sigh. “Deano kissed me.”

Luke’s eyes widen in shock. “What?! Deano’s GAY?”

I pull a face and shrug. “He says not. But … it sounds like he might be bi?”

Luke looks out to the room and shakes his head. “When did THIS happen?”

“The other day. When we were filming our posing videos for Johnny’s assignment.”

Luke screws his face up in further confusion. He looks like he’s struggling for words. Trying to process his thoughts. And then something washes over his face and for some reason, my stomach tightens sharply.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

OH FUCK.

“He … promised me not to!” I say, my insides clenching with nerves.

Luke screws his face up. “Since when are you loyal to Deano?”

Never. Since fucking never!

“I felt sorry for him!”

I’m lying. And Luke knows it. He fucking knows it. 

“So what did you do? When he kissed you?”

Oh my God. Oh my actual fucking GOD.

“I … told him to stop! I told him no!”

Luke’s just looking at me, his eyes narrowed, this weird expression on his face. Then he looks out to my side of the room. To the bed where I was kissing Deano and he was on top of me in his velvet fucking posing trunks just two days ago.

“Okay - I’m confused!” he says, shuffling back on the bed and turning to me. “You told him to stop AFTER he kissed you?”

This. Is. Not. Fucking. Happening!

“Why didn’t you stop him before that? Why did you even let him kiss you?” 

“He … took me by surprise!”

He screws his face up and scoffs. 

“He just lunged towards me! I didn’t have time to think! Honestly Luke - it was nothing!” I say, scooting towards him on the bed. 

Luke looks out to the room again. It’s funny, because he starts playing with the inside of his cheek. Like he’s rolling his tongue around his mouth. Just like fucking Deano was doing yesterday.

“How long?” he says, without looking at me. 

My whole body suddenly goes cold.

“What?”

“How long after did you stop it?”

Oh God oh God oh God.

“Like - I dunno, a few seconds?”

He looks at me, his expression suddenly cold and FUCK - I suddenly feel like I’m right back to where I was a few weeks ago when Luke discovered what I’d wrote about him in my notebook. When he found out the reason I started hanging out with him and helping him out was to get my own room next year. 

“Why didn’t you stop it straight away?”

And there’s the question I never wanted to be asked. The question I was afraid Luke would ask if I confessed to my kiss with Deano. And the reason I didn’t even tell Luke about the kiss in the first place. 

I groan. “Luke - this is stupid!”

“I would have stopped it straight away. I would have told you afterwards!”

“Okay - I messed up!” I say, my voice raising.

And now something else washes over Luke’s expression. “Is there something going on with you and Deano?”

“Oh my God. Luke - NO! Of course there isn't!”

“Then why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you tell me as soon as it happened? Don’t give me that shit that you promised Deano!”

“Because I was scared! I was worried you’d react like THIS!” 

Luke scoffs. “How am I supposed to react, Woody? Deano kisses you and what - you let him?”

“Luke! Trust me. It was NOTHING. Okay - I should have told you straight away. And yes, I probably should have stopped it sooner. But - it meant NOTHING. I mean … it’s fucking Deano. I can’t stand the guy!”

“But you kissed him back.”

My stomach lurches.

“Didn’t you?”

"I just got ... caught up in it!" 

Oh God. His face. Luke’s fucking face. He looks so fucking hurt. I’ve seen that look once before. After he found out about my deal with Johnny. I never wanted to see that look on Luke’s face again, but here it is. I didn’t want to hurt Luke again. But I have. I fucking have! Maybe that was the wrong thing to say. Even though it was the truth.

I lean forward and put my head in my hands. “It didn't mean anything!” I say. I look up at him, he’s sitting there on his bed, his face so full of hurt and confusion. “Luke - you KNOW how I feel about you!”

He chews the inside of his mouth again and looks out to the room. Luke has to get over this. This is just a blip. Surely he'll see that for himself? Surely he’ll get over this?

I reach my arm out and gently place my hand on Luke’s lower back, tickling it with my fingers. He closes his eyes in response. Then I scoot over to sit right next to him, wrapping my other arm around Luke’s waist. He grabs my forearm and sinks his head into my chest. I bury my face into Luke’s hair and take in that scent I love so fucking much. And this huge wave of relief goes through my body. Because it feels like everything’s going to be okay. 

We stay like that for a little while. Just sitting on Luke’s bed, holding each other in silence. And then Luke finally takes his head away from my body and speaks.

“I have to go,” he says, in a quiet voice, not looking at me. 

“Wait - what?!” I say, pulling back from him.

“I have to clear my head.” His voice is louder but calm, but he’s still not looking at me. He can’t be fucking serious? 

“It’s just for a bit!” he says, standing up and reaching under his bed and getting out his holdall, although the time still not looking me in the eye. He looks nervous but determined. 

“Luke - you … you can’t just leave!”

Luke doesn’t respond. He goes into his drawers and starts throwing clothes into his holdall. And I’m just sat here in absolute disbelief, wondering what the actual fuck is happening right now. I feel like I’ve slipped into a bad fucking dream. 

“What the fuck? Luke - what about staying here together next week for the holidays? What about the show on Saturday?”

He just shakes his head as he continues to pack. Why the hell isn’t he looking at me?

“Luke - this is stupid. Just STOP!” I say standing up.

But he doesn’t respond. And he doesn't look up. He just carries on throwing things into his holdall, this determined look on his face. I grab the t-shirt in his hand to stop him from packing it away and hold on to it tightly. “LUKE!”

And then he finally turns to look at me, his eyes wide, his face so full of hurt and anger. “YOU FUCKING KISSED DEANO!” 

And now we’re just looking at each other. And my body feels heavy. Because now I really know that I’ve fucked up. I know there’s no coming back from this. I can feel Luke slipping away from me. My gorgeous little Hufflepuff Luke. With his Tommy Foster poster. And his geeky t-shirts. And his Harry Potter boxer shorts. The boy I’ve spent the last few weeks becoming completely fucking besotted with. In a way I didn’t think I ever would with anyone. And from nowhere, this determination takes over me. 

“NO!” I say, shaking my head and going to the door of our room. “You’re not leaving!”

Luke shakes his head as he puts his jacket on. 

“I’m not letting you go!” I say, blocking the door. We’ve been here before. Last time I got him to stay. This time I’ll do the same.

Luke picks up his holdall and stops a foot away from me, this look of hurt and anger on his face. I can make him stay. I know I can. 

“Woody!” he says. He sounds so exhausted. Like he's given up. But I haven't.

I reach out and grab his hand with mine. He closes his eyes as my fingers grip his. “I'm not letting you go!”

“I can’t stay here, Woody!”

I want to scream, “I can’t be here without you!” but I don’t. Instead I just continue to grip his fingers tightly. Luke tries to pull his hand away, but I carry on gripping tight. 

“Woody!”

He pulls back harder. But I carry on gripping his hand. It’s like I can’t let go. 

“Woody! Let go of my hand!”

But I can’t. Luke pulls back harder and I look at his face and he looks freaked out. Even a little scared. And seeing this, I suddenly release his hand and Luke takes a few steps back. Still looking at me with that freaked out expression. And it feels like an invisible wall suddenly goes up between us.

“Go on then, Luke!” I say, coldly, as I step away from the door. “Fuck off!”

Luke’s face trembles and he lets out a little sobbing noise. And I suddenly feel like I want to cry too. A part of me just wants to reach out and hold him. But I don’t. Because I feel like I’ve shut down. Like I've given enough to Luke. And I don’t want to give him any more.

Luke rushes to the door and opens it. And then, without another word or even looking back, he’s gone. Something in me screams to run after him. To tell him that I don’t want to be here if he’s not here. But I can’t move. I’m paralysed. And so I just stand here. Alone in my dorm room again. Feeling like my world just crumbled into nothing. 

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Wow! This gets better by the chapter - not just the story line but the characters and the quality of the writing as it is now simply gripping. Really so well done @muscleaddict !

Hmm I wondering give the time of year if you aren’t going to be giving us some Christmas crackers and even, possibly, a big Christmas finale to this amazing piece of writing?! 😜

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27 minutes ago, WashburnDaddy said:

Wow! This gets better by the chapter - not just the story line but the characters and the quality of the writing as it is now simply gripping. Really so well done @muscleaddict !

Hmm I wondering give the time of year if you aren’t going to be giving us some Christmas crackers and even, possibly, a big Christmas finale to this amazing piece of writing?! 😜

Thank you, matie. I often have doubts about my writing abilities, probably like most writers do, so I appreciate that! The story will definitely be finished before Christmas! 😉

59 minutes ago, TonnyGiant said:

OMG! I don't even know what to say ... so many emotions that I'm choking.

Hehe! Glad it had an effect on you, mate! ☺️

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1 hour ago, TonnyGiant said:

OMG! I don't even know what to say ... so many emotions that I'm choking.

The same thing here.  I could hear them, I could see them, I could feel their pain and panic.  Their anguish and fear.  This is astonishingly good writing.  I was so caught up by it that I found my eyes racing ahead, zipping through the words too fast, so fast that I actually had to tell myself, no, stop, go back, really read it, really experience it.

muscleaddict, you have overwhelmed us.

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OMG I feel so bad for them, such good writing, I'm actually tearing up...

I'm sad everybody's hurt now and I can't wait to read what else you have in store for them

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Ummmm I wonder if Deano is gonna give some comfort to woody........

After all woody does do some stupid things when he's pissed off

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Fuck! What a amazingly written, heartbreaking chapter.You @muscleaddict really exceeded all  my expectations with this chapter. Fantastic cliffhanger.  Awesome job mate!👍🍾

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On 11/11/2019 at 2:58 PM, crushme99 said:

I agree.  Some sort of massive incident must be on the horizon, some sort of crisis which will – let's hope – lock the relationship between Luke and Woody in cement.

But what?  Is there some way Deano can "out" Luke and Woody without implicating himself?  Will Deano be so enraged at Woody's rejection that he slugs him on stage?  Or put two and two together and slug Luke?  – The possibilities are endless.  And we have to hold our breath.  Thanks, muscleaddict.  You so totally RULE.

You were correct about the massive incident! Although they haven't even made it to the competition yet!

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 “Just roommates?? Looks like some of our fellow Montgomery students have been keeping secrets.”

Lol I read this in "Gossip Girl" Voice.

Man this went the predictable way.. Im dissapointed but im sure Luke and Woody will patch things up.

Now im sure things will be hard on the competition if Deano is even allowed to participate

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