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the Bullpen part1.


Marquis

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One complaint:

In English, quotation marks in and of themselves are sufficient to signal dialogue. The preliminary dash you employ is both unnecessary and distracting. Please stop using it.

Otherwise, great story. Rafael is hot and sweet, his caretaker seems like a stand-up guy, and you have done a convincing job of portraying Chad as a douchebag. Here's hoping we see more of Leigh and Rafael!

 

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9 hours ago, arpeejay said:

In English, quotation marks in and of themselves are sufficient to signal dialogue. The preliminary dash you employ is both unnecessary and distracting. Please stop using it.

I'll keep that in mind. We use the dash in french to signal each time a new charachter speaks. it's actually quite convenient once you're used to it. But hey, do in Rome as the Romans do ;)

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