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Marquis

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I really enjoyed it, particularly the perspective of Landon having trouble getting used to his body after such a sudden change. Not enough writers do that.

My one suggestion would be the relationship between Damon and Lamia needing to be more cut throat in the long run. Demons always look out for number one, and how to take other higher demons positions. So, any 'friendship' between two demons might seem amicable on the surface, but would only serve the purpose of furthering their own goals, suppressing a potential rival, or sucking up. When the time comes however, they'll cut the dead weight in half a heart beat.

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I agree with darkluster4 about Landon's issues getting used to his new body. That was a great twist.  I mean, how many of us fantasize about the kind of growth in these stories, but then might have pause when faced with the reality of being almost a foot taller and hundreds of pounds heavier with solid muscle? Of course it's a dilemma I'd like to face (I think)!  Another great move was the use of male and female articles for the demons in this chapter and their own reactions to it.  It kind of threw me for a loop in the first chapter, using "it" for Damon, but then when I saw what you were doing with it in the second, I really appreciated the detail.

Overall, the story has been fantastic so far!  I'm definitely looking forward to more.

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