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I have been reading everyone's stories for a long time now. Figured i'd start writing some too. Let me know what you think!

 

 

 

 

 

Bill pt 1

 

“It has been a long time since you've focused on yourself Bill, ever since your wife passed two years ago.” Brian said. “I know, but I just want what’s best for Nate…it’s been hard working full-time here and having to be a single father.”  Bill is a 52 year old father of Nathan, a 18 year old who just finished high school and is looking towards the future. Bill is about 5’8’’ with a skinny build, only weighs about 150 lbs and has salt and pepper hair which is a buzz cut to his head.  He is a police officer for the local town and has been for about 19 years.  He is proud of his son Nathan, but has always been envious of how easy he could build muscle through his high school sports.  Nathan is about the same height as his dad, 5’9’’, but has a medium build and weighs about 195 lbs.

Brian and Bill were driving around in their patrol car. Bill was thinking of how he can be more of a father to his son, more specifically, how he could build muscle.  He would consider himself athletic and lifts at the gym often through the week, tho throughout his life he has never been an easy gainer.  Bill looks over at Brian and asks, “Hey Brian, were do you workout?”  Brian: “Why do you ask?”  Bill looks down and says, “I have noticed you lift a fair amount, and it really shows…you’re built.”  Brian: “Well actually to tell the truth, this is not all me…don’t get me wrong, I’ve put the effort in, but I’ve had some help along the way.” Bill: “Do you take steroids?” Brian: “No, something else…can you keep a secret?” Bill has different thoughts going through his head about what Brian could say next, but he was curious. Bill: “Sure man.” Brian: “Well… I’ve actually been involved in some medical trial study down at that lab on Gateway Blvd, you know the place?” Bill: “Yeah, I’ve passed it by a few times, never been there before though.” Brian: “Well, recently they have been focusing their research on building muscle. I don’t really understand how it works so much, but man I’ve really noticed a difference. No side affects either.”  Bill: “Really! That sounds great, are they looking for more candidates?” Brian: “Unfortunately this study is finished, but they are looking for people to trial a new growth serum which is supposed to provide better results, here is the scientist’s card, his name is Sam. Tell him I sent you and you interest in the study if you are.” Bill: “Thanks Brian, I’ll think about it.”

Bill finished work around 3pm. He was sitting in his car thinking about the conversation he had with Brian today.  This is something Bill has thought about much of his life.  Maybe this study is his answer to a better him. Bill pulled out the card…then his cell.

Bill got home soon after. He actually setup an appointment for the next day for evaluation at the lab, they actually said they could possibly do the trial tomorrow night if he is a candidate, he would just have to stay overnight. Bill was already off for the next couple days, so it worked off perfectly. He also explained to Nate that he wouldn’t be home tomorrow night when he gets home, that he may be going out with some friends from work.

 

Nathan understood. However he noticed something different about his dad. It was almost like he had a pep in his step again. Ever since his mom passed, his dad has always been positive, but always seemed to be a little held back at the same time because of it. Nathan was curous, but brushed it off. They headed off to bed, Bill looking forward to the next day.

Bill showed up at the lab at 10am as instructed. Sam was there to greet him in the waiting room and brought him back to an exam room where Sam took many body measurements, a blood and urine sample, and had Bill fill out a bunch of paperwork on his health history as well as asking a bunch of questions. It felt like forever for Bill, but it had  actually been about 2 hours, less than the 3 he was told. After, Sam said he would be back in about an hour as he processed the results. In the mean time Bill sat and watched some TV in the waiting room.  As he sat he noticed that he didn’t see many staff around at all other than Sam, and was curious.  “I guess this is a lab, they must be all in the back or something, spinning test tubes and such like you see in labs on TV” he thought.

Sam came back soon after with a smile on his face, congrats Bill! You’re a candidate for the study!  Bill’s spirits were lifted when he heard it. As the time passed, he was beginning to think he wasn’t going to work out for it. Bill agreed to participate in the study, he signed some papers and changed into a hospital gown. Bill felt strange in it but was ok. He then sat in a reclined chair in procedure room. Everything looked very clean and the room was bright. The table next to him had a computer as well as some syringes and other medical supplies.  A camera was hanging from the ceiling for the study.

 

Sam then went on to explain the procedure to Bill.  Sam was going to give Bill a series of shots. The first was a type of relaxer to help with anxiety. Second was another shot, this was a type of chemical which would, in a way, prep the muscles for growth. The last was another shot, this was different however, and the one Bill was most anxious about. The last shot was the experimental growth hormone/testosterone which would have to be injected into the testicles directly. This is the first for human trials, but has worked well on the rat trial subjects with staggering results and no side effects noted.  It only takes the last about 5-10 minutes to kick in, and works for about a 12 hour period. 

 

Sam went ahead and gave the relaxer first.  He turned his back to prep for the next injection, it took him about 5 minutes to get it ready but he wanted to give the first shot a chance to work on Bill before the next two were given.  Sam was serious in his work but came to notice that he didn’t hear anything from Bill for a while. He turned around to look at him.  Bill was sitting in the chair with a blank look on his face, starring straight forward. “You ok Bill” Sam asked. “Yes, I’m fine.” Bill replied in a monotone voice. Sam was nervous after this strange response. He looked at the first shot he gave and typed the number off the vial into the computer to look it up, as the computer was searching, he prayed he hadn’t grabbed the wrong vial. He is never lax in his work.  The results came. Sam was in shock, he had given Bill a highly experimental neurological suggestive serum, never been trialed.

 

Sam then frantically checked Bill out by taking his vitals, and doing a full body exam. Everything checked out perfect except that Bill was highly suggestible. Bill basically did everything Sam asked. Sam then asked Bill to stand up out of the chair. He stood right away. He then asked him to walk to the door and back. Bill again did as he was told. Sam was scared but was getting a little excited at the same time. Mind control had always been a fetish of his. He then gave Bill a multitude of commands, which he followed just to make sure his assumptions were true. Bill did them all with no question. Sam then had a though in his mind. He then asked Bill to take off his gown. Bill did it right away and dropped it to the ground. Bill had an ok build as described earlier with a good amount of salt and pepper chest hair as well but the most distinguishing feature was his cock size. It was 7’’ soft.  Sam would never consider himself gay, maybe bisexual. His work had taken up so much of his time, he didn’t have much of a personal life.  At this moment though, he was feeling an attraction to Bill.  Sam was about 28 and very skinny, weighed only about 135lb at 5’5’’.  He always liked the way well build older men looked.  Bill was almost that except for the muscle aspect, but Sam could change that.

 

Sam was starting to get worked up at this point. He knew it was wrong but he decided he was the only one in the lab today, with no one to come over the weekend. He was safe. Bill was expected to stay in the lab overnight anyways. Sam decided to continue the study. He could cover up later. He then had Bill sit in the chair, still naked. “It will be better to see the results anyways…” Sam thought.  He strapped him in and gave shot two. Bill did great with that. Now for the main event, what he was looking forward to anyways. Sam then thought for a second, why not give him a larger dose… He then turned around and drew up 3 more times the original dose in the syringe.  Sam was getting a little nervous but excited at the same time. He was going to make the perfect man for him. Sam grabbed onto Bill’s testicles, admiring the size and shape, and gave a shot into both, Bill didn’t even flinch. Sam sat, observing the results for a while. Nothing happened. About 5 minutes had passed. But then Sam noticed something, Bill’s testicles began to enlarge ever so slightly. At this point he noticed that Bill was starting to moan out loud. Very softly at first but got louder through the starting process.  The growth to Bill’s testicles progressed. They grew to the size of golf balls first, then tennis balls, then grapefruits, all over a matter of minutes. Bill's cock had morphed into a heavy column of meat. He'd even developed a massive juicy foreskin that bloated out the circumference of the cock and make it appear even larger. It had to be at least 15 inches in length and probably 10 inches around. It started to get hard in front of Sam as it bobbed and throbbed and seemed to be breathing on it's own.

 

Then more changes began to happen. Veins on Bill’s cock were already huge, pumping large amounts of blood to his growing cock.  Bill’s breathing increased as well. You could tell at this point that the serum was starting to spread to the rest of Bill’s body through his blood stream.  Bill was starting to moan and grunt louder and louder, both in pleasure and in pain.  Next, serum began to spread and work on other parts of Bill’s body.  Sounds of growth and cracking came from Bill as he grew taller and more muscular by the second. Soon, he had a solid 8 pack of abs brick by brick. Lats began to spread like wings. Pecs began to enlarge forming a dip in between them and definite striations.  His nipples began to point downwards as well.  Next came his arms and legs. Biceps, triceps and forarms began to explode with growth.  His quads and calves as well.  Bill quickly turned from an in shape middle-aged man into a hot bodybuilder, all over a matter of minutes.

 

The change was not over yet, Bill only had a small amount of chest hair before the process, now more chest hairs began springing up all over the now chiseled surface.  He clean shaven face now had a good amount of scruffy growth upon it.  Bill then fell to the ground on his knees and fists, still grunting and breathing hard.  After about 15 min from the start of the growth process, it gradually slowed and stopped. Bill had built up quite a sweat by this point but was calming down. 

 

Sam was so excited at this point.  He wanted to really see his subject.  Sam then instructed Bill to stand up off the ground. He did right away. Bill now towered over Samat about 6’2’’, he had grown taller.  Sam couldn’t help himself. He began to feel Bill’s muscles over his body. Sam was loving it.  Bill’s chest and arms were so hard with muscle, Sam felt that he couldn’t dent them even if he tried his hardest.  Bill was now the man Sam dreamed about, and he was under his control.  Bill just stood still as Sam admired his creation of a man.  Sam’s cock was rock hard at this point and he wanted more.  Sam began to think about what he could do with Bill at this point. He didn’t really want Bill to continue to just follow commands, he wanted him to have a personality as well.  Sam then came up with a perfect plan.

 

“Bill”, Sam said. “Yes master” said Bill. “I want you to listen carefully to the following commands.” “Yes” said Bill.  Same began, “When I say nook, you will regain your normal personality but will remain under my control, you will not question any of my commands or suggestions, I will still be your master and you will address me as such. You will increase your love for building muscle and developing your body.  You will also now have an attraction to men as well, regardless of what you were attracted to before. Do you understand Bill?” “I understand master” Bill said. Sam then said, “Great, hey Bill, nook.”  The glaze left Bill’s eyes and he began to look around.

“Why am I naked….but these muscles, I never had this much.” Bill began to feel his chest , arms and much of the muscle on his body.  Sam was loving this.  Sam then said, “How do you feel Bill?” “Better than ever, this is what I have always wanted…I kinda feel 

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I love it!!! I'm usually not one for mind control or hypnosis, but this is pretty hot with the injection/growth element. Keep it up and I can't wait to see more. 

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Hmm I don't think the mental stuff is played into well just a means to an end not an enjoyable component, at least not yet.  Also the doctor changes a little... too fast.  He goes from accidentally, and with concern and guilt checking on the side effects, of injecting a hypnotic into his patient's veins.  Then tests its limits and then goes too far.  So far so good.  Then he's over injecting a growth compound, just because.

 

The set up, the characters, and the ideas and premise have me interested.  but this feels more overview and summarized as to in it, at least so far.  I hope you finish, get your idea of what's happening on paper then, carefully, reread and then flesh out and make it full of sights, sounds, and proceedings.

 

Just my opinion.  You have some nifty characters and a fun and elaborate situation.  but aren't utilizing it quite well yet.  I do like we seem to be starting from two people first but that gets lost in service of the plot.  And trust me I am an easy lay for these things its just too flat and you lose me especially when you emphasize this will be mentally affecting and not just physical.  You also promise a gradual transformation in a setting where it can be observed and anything can happen.  Things go a bit quickly and nothing informs or interrupts the process.

 

That's what I'd find disappointing.

But the appeal is the older character, his friendships and set up with the Doctor (at first) and the son and other stuff.  I hope, again you keep writing and then revise I think you'll find it a satisfying experience.

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