billyed1 Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 Another excellent chapter! I must agree with Mature though, I hope Chad's height doesn't become too implausible. Can't wait for the posing pouch fitting and full body shave. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dredlifter Posted March 29, 2017 Author Share Posted March 29, 2017 10 hours ago, fillups said: What you've done here is impressive on so many levels. Clearly the feedback you're getting here confirms that. What I think makes this work is how well you ground the fantasy in reality. You get things like contest prep, heavy duty training, Ezekiel bread, the excitement at the expo Dang man that's some analysis! I love it! And I appreciate the compliments. I've been following bodybuilding for years and trying to be a BB'er myself, so I was hoping I was getting most of the little details right. Hopefully I don't let you down with the upcoming competition. I see Ted as the wise old man of the story, even though he is younger than Ted, lol. Keep in mind that Ted himself is a complete stud. He has permanent single digit bodyfat and movie-star handsome to boot. I think he's satisfied with what he's accomplished. He has that true selfless, "coach" type personality who is happy to push his star protege, Chad, to his limit. I think Jed realizes that his Dad would never intentionally hurt or embarrass him, which is why he doesn't feel any true animosity. Chad even tried to hide it from Jed when he was banging his son's friend to try to protect his feelings and I think Jed realized that after he calmed down. Plus, just being around someone as huge and powerful as Chad, you can't help but feel emasculated and it's not like there's anything Chad can do about it. Chad can't make himself look smaller. Plus, Jed knows his Dad will always have his back and now that Chad is enormous, he almost sees his Dad as his own personal superhero. I'm glad I seem to be keeping at least air of realism, that's always my goal. My favorite stories are always the slow growth ones that are at least somewhat plausible. I definitely struggled with that realism aspect when writing about Chad stealing Josh's girlfriend. That scenario probably stretched the truth too much, oh well, lol. I just really wanted to show how dominant Chad CAN be if you push him too much. He's still a great guy, but if you truly mess with him he won't let you get away with it! Anyway, again, I appreciate the analysis. As well written as it was I think we would like to see YOU write a story too. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kymuscleboy Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 I thought I had written some decent comments, but fillups knocked it out of the park! That was an excellent analysis of what makes this story so engaging. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fillups Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 9 hours ago, dredlifter said: As well written as it was I think we would like to see YOU write a story too. Thanks so much for this, I really appreciate the compliment. Truly, I lack the patience and time to create something as terrific as what you have done here. Also, like my morphs, I tend to floor the gas pedal on the growth and strength aspects--compelling, slow building realism be damned. While it makes the process of creation enjoyable for me (which is my goal with this hobby) the end product ends up cartoonish and inferior to work like yours. in your description of Ted though, I discovered partially why I identify with him (not that I've ever attained a similar king of the gym status). As a former teacher and coach, I have a similar mindset as Ted in really enjoying my proteges' success. So, I'm better at analyzing what you've done than doing it myself. At any rate, I really appreciate the tremendous work you've put into writing this. If I seemed critical of small aspects of your story at all (like Jed's or Ted's possible bad feelings), that's not actually the case. The story you've built really is working because of these choices not despite them. That I would like Ted's or Jed's stories to arc differently shows my level of engagement rather than any flaw in what you've created. I truly hope you see your vision through and I get to read it. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esshar Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 I think an appropriate song about Chad is Cole Porter's 1938 song 'My Heart Belongs to Daddy'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flamedelft Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 On 29. 3. 2017 at 1:58 PM, fillups said: Thanks so much for this, I really appreciate the compliment. Truly, I lack the patience and time to create something as terrific as what you have done here. Also, like my morphs, I tend to floor the gas pedal on the growth and strength aspects--compelling, slow building realism be damned. While it makes the process of creation enjoyable for me (which is my goal with this hobby) the end product ends up cartoonish and inferior to work like yours. in your description of Ted though, I discovered partially why I identify with him (not that I've ever attained a similar king of the gym status). As a former teacher and coach, I have a similar mindset as Ted in really enjoying my proteges' success. So, I'm better at analyzing what you've done than doing it myself. At any rate, I really appreciate the tremendous work you've put into writing this. If I seemed critical of small aspects of your story at all (like Jed's or Ted's possible bad feelings), that's not actually the case. The story you've built really is working because of these choices not despite them. That I would like Ted's or Jed's stories to arc differently shows my level of engagement rather than any flaw in what you've created. I truly hope you see your vision through and I get to read it. I'd just like to point out that different people like different things, and you should definitely post your story, not everyone is into the longform story that dredlifter is sharing, and not every story has to be as great as his Anyway, great chapter as always dredlifter, I like the narration style with Jed describing what he's hearing and his assumptions based on that. That's not done very often. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dredlifter Posted March 30, 2017 Author Share Posted March 30, 2017 On 3/29/2017 at 6:58 AM, fillups said: Thanks so much for this, I really appreciate the compliment. Truly, I lack the patience and time to create something as terrific as what you have done here. Also, like my morphs, I tend to floor the gas pedal on the growth and strength aspects--compelling, slow building realism be damned. While it makes the process of creation enjoyable for me (which is my goal with this hobby) the end product ends up cartoonish and inferior to work like yours. I agree with flamdelt! Don't let your preference for fast, freaky massive growth deter you! While I definitely prefer the slowburn style, I can still appreciate a hot story with fast, freaky growth. But, in truth, I understand that it can seem like a huge undertaking to write a story. I've been surprised with how much work it really takes to write, edit and post a chapter with decent length about once a week. Also, I didn't think you were being too critical at all, no worries whatsoever. I honestly appreciated your comments. 4 hours ago, flamedelft said: Anyway, great chapter as always dredlifter, I like the narration style with Jed describing what he's hearing and his assumptions based on that. That's not done very often. Thanks again! Maybe I'll try it some more. I think it certainly works to enhance the fantasy. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muscleboy81 Posted March 31, 2017 Share Posted March 31, 2017 I still wonder if with treatments. Jed takes a Little more after his old man. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrAlice Posted March 31, 2017 Share Posted March 31, 2017 3 hours ago, Muscleboy81 said: I still wonder if with treatments. Jed takes a Little more after his old man. Oh yeah, we are ALL super hoping that he does. Jed is so likeable, it'd be super rewarding to see him get to grow alongside his old man! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bear Posted March 31, 2017 Share Posted March 31, 2017 Consider me quoting the above, liking the idea of Jed growing bigger along with the "old man". He's already on his way...but how much like his dad is he? Also, just an idea that's interesting to me. What are Chad's dreams like? A "dream sequence" digression of Chad's - getting bigger, even seriiously giant sized...more women, being worshipped in a harem, demonstrating his superiority in a very direct way over some arrogant jerk, whatever it is, could be one way to go for a moment and not break the main story. Also - longform stuff is fun. I like the tension, it's interesting! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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