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When he says, "Marry me.  I turn 56 next week and I plan on getting bigger.  I'm also horny all the time."

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                                      (he really turns 56 on January 24th - Woof!)

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No one would dare wrestle him - until he said he'd take on twelve at one time.  That's when guys volunteered.  He easily won three rounds - with twelve new guys each time.  He complained because he didn't even break a sweat.

 

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He had pinned the two of us - his pups - to the bed by placing a bar loaded with some insane amount of weight on top of us.  It rested on our hip bone, so we were still able to breathe, but we couldn't budge the thing at all.

"Come on fellas, this old man carried that bar in here with one hand.  Can't the two of you move it?"

 

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"I went and ripped up the street sign and wrapped it around you so you wouldn't forget where I lived.  I see it worked.  Glad you found it okay.  Need me to bend that thing off of you?"

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